Outside Reading: Always Running #5

Overall I really enjoyed reading Always Running. Being able to read this book and at the same time have my marketplace of ideas topic to research more about gang violence I felt like I was able to get great and accurate information about this topic in all different places. For my marketplace of ideas project, where I tried to build awareness of the problem, I was able to do that by learning about the organization called ceasefire where they try to end all the violence, and since they started in the city of chicago there has been a huge difference. I learned different things from the book, because in the book i was able to see specific stories from one persons experience. The movie and the project I did was a way broader experience, and with the two things I think I was able to learn a lot of the same topic in two different points of views. One thing i did like about this book is that after all of the bad things that happens in his life, he turns his life around. "I finally graduated high school, quite an achievement"(220). That really was an achievement and then he went on to write this book. it shows that its possible to go from the bottom and change your life. In a way its inspiring that I was reading a book writing by a gang member who lived these real experiences and has lived on to tell the story, and warn his son and people everywhere how the gang life really is.

Outside Reading: Always Running #4

The people who are involved in gangs not only risk there own lives everyday fighting on the streets for almost no reason that I would understand, but some of them have families that they are completely disregarding by involving themselves in this violence. "The Animal Tribe practically died with the death of one of the last presidents: John Fabela. Seventeen year old John -whose girlfriend was pregnant with his infant daughter- succumbed to a shotgun blast in his living room as his younger brother watched from beneath a bed in an adjacent room"(108). I know that its is virtually impossible for me to relate to this lifestyle because mine is 100 percent different, but for me its just hard to read how often brothers watch their siblings get killed or beat up in a fight and just move on so quickly from it. I read that in the book, and in the documentary The Interrupters, they showed cases of random shootings that happen all the time. It comes to a point where its not even surprising anymore and thats what so hard for me to comprehend. For some people thats just a completely normal life. In the book, his girlfriend now has to raise their child along because he died for his gang. To me it seems like these gangs are so important to the members that they understand that its a possibility that their families will lose everything, but those are just consequences they have to live with. I guess for me even after doing research and reading about the topic its hard to comprehend how my lives gang violence really does affect, in such tragic ways.

Outside Reading: Always Running #3

One scene in the book was about police brutality, and the whole time I was reading it I was completely disgusted. At first Luis and his friends saw the undercover cops and thought there were just white guys watching mexicans. then they got closer and one of them said, "Come on greasers who wants to go first?" to which one of Luis' friends answer with profanity. then the undercover vops flashed a badge and took advantage of them cuz they felt powerful. Luis and his friends didnt do anyhting to get yelled at and when he tried to move his leg the cop said to him, "Dont fuckin' move. Did I give you permission to move? Dont do anything unless I say, you fuckin' greaser asshole"(66). The white police men used their power in a horrible way and treated these guys like animals. To me that is part of the reason we have inequalities in this world because people with a little power take advantage of the power they have a treat people, who dont deserve to me treated badly, horrible. These people dont deserve that and that could be why they revolt, becasue they are going to be treated like taht anyways so why dont they get in trouble and beat up for a reason instead of just because they were at the beach.

Outside Reading: Always Running #2

For this blogpost I wanted to focus on the Authors realtionship with his brother. When they were younger they never got along, they would fiit and it seemed like his brother got everything, "my brother and I were moving away from eachother. Our tastes, our friends, our interest, were miles apart. yet there were a few outstanding incidents I fondly remember in relationship to my brother, incidents which despite their displays of closeness failed to breach the distance which would lie between us"(49). the incident im going to write about is one that both brought them close and separted them. They were young boys who were confronted by these white boys on the street.The Author, Luis, stuck up for his older brother Rano, Rano said, "You didnt have to defend me to those dudes, they're assholes. They aint worth it. Luis answered him and said, "I did it becuase I love you"(51). Luis said, "I looked at him and i told him something i never, ever told him again"(51). He felt compassion for his brother, he wanted to stick up for him like a gang member would stick up for their gang brother, and thats what he did for his older brother, but Rano didnt feel the same way. It seemed like he wanted to be able to defend himself. He didnt want his little brother looking better and fighting fights for him. He didnt need anyone fighting fights for him. Its sad because Luis fought to help his brother so they both make it out alive, not to try to be better then him. Its sad because Luis did love his brother and it didnt seem like Rano felt the same way, at least he didnt show it.

Outside Reading: Always Running #1

I decided to read "Always Running" by Luis J. Rodriquez because gang violence is something that I've always been interested in learning about but never really did anything about learning about it. The first couple pages were very interesting, and for me they were extremely interesting because they were all true stories about how he got involved with the gangs. Its really interesting for me that for some of these kids getting involved with gangs is less of a choice and more of a family issue. Most of these kids had parents who were involved and they were around gangs, and talking from experience, I like to follow in my parents foot steps so why wouldn't these kids? "Mama always seemed to be sick. For one thing, she was overweight and suffered from a form of diabetes. She had thyroid problems, bad nerves and high blood pressure. She was in her thirties, but she had all these ailments. She didn't even have teeth"(23). With his mom being sick he really doesn't have a mother figure to point him in the right direction. She was so young, but she had such a hard time just taking care of him and raising him when he was little. Him and his brother were basically on their own. They got into trouble and when they got home their mother would, "chase after my brother with a belt or a board" (23). That was their punishment, their mother was too weak to do anything else, and also that seemed to be the norm during the time they were growing and where they were growing up, but it did not change the route they went on. If anything it pushed them to the wrong route of life.

Shaw Shank Redemption

We have been watching the movie Shaw Shank Redemption in class, this is my first time watching it, but from what I have heard about it everyone who has seen it loves it and talks about how intense it is. We have yet to finish the movie but there was one thing from the movie that I was intrigued by. When the character brooks got released from jail and then soon after his release he killed himself. Although they got beat up in jail and it was not real life there, they made a life out of what they had. Being in jail for such a long period of time they got used to everything jail provided for them. thye got used to the life they lived. They all had their own indentity in jail and their own role. Going into the real world they didnt have an identity or role being gone for so long. Brooks didnt have a family or anything to live for so he killed himself. Although prison is nothing like life, they had friends and people to talk to, things to do. Being in their for so long they had a life. Going into world everything was so different, and its almost impossible to make the transition without help. As much as people wanted to get out of the prison, how do they know they can survive in waht is known as the real world?

End of the year

As school is coming to an end, and im graduation is quickly getting closer and closer I cant help but get sad about how fast time flys. I feel like it was yesterday when I was that little scared freshman starting high school not having any idea whats in store for me. The funny thing is that I have to do that all over again next year. Im going to be that little scared freshman not knowing anyone or anything, getting lsot in the big campus. The funny thing is that its all just a big cycle, I came into high school knowing about 8 people, im going into college knowing about the same amount of people. for me it was very stressful starting high school in the small town and somewhat small high school only knowing a few people. next year I am off to a huge college with about 40,000 undergraduate students and again I only know a few people. Hopefully it will all turn out ok for me, but for now I have no idea what to expect and that scares me so much. All I can do is hope for the best and be myself.

War on Gay Teens

I am going to be honest here and say that I have never felt very strong about gay right. Now I'm not saying there shouldn't be gay rights because I believe that if your in love your in love and you should be able to express that. So I do think gay people should have rights, but I wouldn't be the one protesting and advocating for gay rights. Simply for the reason that I don't think I have connections to that in my life, or people close to me who have been really affected by the law.
I do have one experience that I could talk about. I will never forget the first time I learned what it meant to be gay or lesbian. My cousin who is probably about 10 years older then me was came over to my house and brought a girl over, who at the time I thought was just her friend, just like I bring friends place I simply thought she did the same thing. I did start to notice some touching and sitting on each others lap and I remember asking my mom why they did all that, she said she would tell me later. At this point I was about 7 or 8, maybe a little younger and would always ask my oldest cousin if she had a boy friend or if I could be the flower girl at the wedding, thinking there was nothing wrong with that. Immediately after she left our house my parents sat me down and said "your cousin is a lesbian." I was so confused because I really had a slight idea of what that meant, so I asked "what does that mean" my mom answered with, "well you know how dad and I love each other? Well she has those same feelings, but for girls instead of boys." It went something like that right after she told me that before I could even respond to her, the doorbell rang it was my cousin at the door. She came in with a huge smile on her face and goes "I left without giving shira a hug!" and she went in to give me a hug and I ran away from her. I still feel bad about doing that.
Obviously at the time, I did not realize the controversies of lesbian and gay couples, and that I was not the only person who acted that way. I didn't realize how hard it was for her to come out and be comfortable with the fact she is a lesbian, and she wasn't even able to be proud or happy for herself.
After reading, "Our Town's War on Gay Teens" from Rolling Stone magazine the story of my cousin came back and hit me hard. To see and entire town  and school make it so hard for these children to be comfortable in their own skin was so hard for me to read. Imagining if I was in that position, with no one to talk to, and being gay would just be a huge elephant in the room that no teacher was allowed to acknowledge.When I read, "teachers were, of course, reminded to never show personal support for GLBT people" I was shocked and disgusted. They dont need to give preference to GLBT kids for any means, but this in a rule in the school then they wonder why there is such a high suicide rate in the town. Maybe if the kids were treated like normal children from the teachers who are supposed to be role models, there might not be such a high suicide rate. These kids are being treated like they are so different and their feelings are so wrong, and they dont know how to change the way they feel so some of them kill themselves which is horrible.
I really felt like my 7 year old self acted in this horrible way and although I really did not know the extent of the issue at the time, I now understand how important is to accept people for who they are, not who they like.

Affirmative Action

The University of Michigan admits their students based on a point system. It is a very controversial system because applicants who are in a racial minority receive 20 points, when there is a total 150 points. Although many people believe this is not fair to white people because they cannot receive those 20 points, Tim Wise disagrees. This goes back to the idea of White denial. Those 20 points are highlighted and bolded, but no one is looking at the points that are almost impossible for students of color to get based on where they live and the resources they have, "Ten points are awarded to students who attended top-notch high schools, and another eight points are given to students who took an especially demanding AP and honors curriculum"(Tim Wise). Although its possible for blacks to get those points it highly unlikely just based on where they are from. So even though those 20 points seem unfair, no one is commenting on the amount of points that are hard for people of color to get. In California there is a law banning affirmative action for college admission, but now that has been under review because, "the percentage of underrepresented minorities have dropped significantly at UC's most prestigious campuses since Proposition 209 was passed, creating a more hostile environment for those students". This proves that having a system that brings in more diversity will be beneficial to the students in a classroom environment. Having a system set to bring in more diverstiy will just give those students a more equal chance of gettting into those colleges as the white students. As I said before it can connect to the idea of white denial, because white people are not realizing that without a system like this, black people do not have the same equal oppurtunities to be accepted into colleges without have race and background coming into play. If they want the program to be equal having something like a points system to have more diverstiy in a school really is not a problem.

Denial

I read the chapter Denial, in the book "White Like Me" by Tim Wise. In this chapter he discusses how people say all the time that racism is gone, it doesn't exist anymore, but in reality that is just denial about the racism that does exist in our country. It all starts from being white and not wanting to admit there is a problem, because, "If you're white and willing to concede that the system is stacked against people of color, that means it must be stacked in your favor, and to admit that is to open oneself up to all kinds of unproductive guilt and self-recrimination." It is easier to be in denial and say there is no problem when white people are getting all the privileges and having no problems. Once they start to speak out and admit there is an issue,  the issue then becomes bold and out there. It immediately becomes an open issue and if someone triess to ignore it or stray away from it they will, to start, feel guilty, and two, be in the public eye and be seen as a racist, "once a crime is acknowledged, it can't be minimized, smoothed over, essentially made to be no big deal." That is the core idea of denial. Racism is clear all over the place, but if people don't talk about it and act like its not there, they start to believe it actually doesn't exist especially because they don't experience it.

Another part of white denial that is mentioned, is the "Oprah effect". Oprah is an obvious successful black woman. She is a person who extreme left wing David Horowitz uses to try and prove that racism and inequality doesn't exist because she is black and so successful. Yes it is possible to be successful with the right resources and hard work, but just because there are a few exceptions to inequalities again does not mean they don't exist to a huge degree. Wise also makes the point that no matter if you are Oprah Winfrey, or just a black person, their will always be insecurities that somebody is judging you just because of your skin color, "No white person turned away after a store had closed, or given bad customer service, would ever have to consider that perhaps we had been treated that way because of out race".  White people never worry about racism because it has never been a problem for them. That's what makes denial so much easier. They have not experienced it, they don't know what it feels like so they just say that it doesn't exist.

If I Were A Poor Black Kid Response

        When I read the article "If I Were A Poor Black Kid," my initial thought was the question that was brought up in class the other day. The question was, if you had to change from white skin to black skin and you were offered any sum of money for the inconvenience how much money would you ask got? My response was I would ask for enough money to be able to have the same opportunities I have now, no matter my skin color. Like the article said, there are opportunities for everyone, it is just about pursuing those opportunities that stops people. It is easier for color people to get involve with a bad crowd at school or outside of school, then coming home from school and opening their books and pursing all the free options and resourses on the computer. I believe that yes, it will be harder for a black person going to a inner city school, with less resources to prepare one for the next steps in life, but its still possible and the excuses about where your from and who your are, are not enough. The hardest part about doing this, is getting started, because like the author said, "Many of these kids don’t have the brains to figure this out themselves – like my kids.  Except that my kids are just lucky enough to have parents and a well-funded school system around to push them in the right direction." That is the one speed bump, the fact that these kids are not being pushed or motivated to do anything with their lives. most of them do not have parents pushing them to go to college and do good thinsg in their lives, and it seems like the teachers in their schools are letting them know all of the possibly resources out there. The hardest part is they have to do it all on their own. That is something I know I never had to face, and im pretty sure 95% of my school doesn't do it alone either. Even though that is such a simple concept, when a person ahs noone to tell them how proud they are, or to keep them in line, they feel useless, and they go out and get themselves into trouble, because why not? Thats why I believe although its possible for all the things the author said in the article to happen, its not all that likely because these kids are doing it alone.
        After reading other responses to the article, I still feel the same way. I agree with what they say that this is almost unrealistic, but I still dont think its impossible. I think a huge problem in this issue is the discount between blacks and whites. White people write blogs like this with their opinion, might not be true because, yes, they have not experienced living as a black person, and the black people respond like it was the most insulting thing ever that a white person could write something they think is possible. I understand that they do not appriciate people thinking their life could possibly be easier then it is, because then it looks like they arent working as hard as they could. I get the amount of inequality in the world and how much harder it is for black poor people to succeed and get jobs. I get that all. But instead of continuing to complain and become offended about it, why dont they explain it. Until blacks and whites start to get along, and dont view eachother as ignorant (on both sides of the spectrum), there really wont be any change. It takes two sides to make a difference. Not saying that a nice response to an article is really going to make a change, but maybe it will show the author of "If I Were A Poor Black Kid" that what he is saying is not reality. Showing him that and proving it in a respectable way, will maybe change his and others opinions on the matter. I know after reading that response, my opinions didnt change, but i got angry at the way it was written, just like the author of the response got angry at the Forbes article. Its a too way street, people need to start talking and acting different if they want to see change.

Hidden Bias

The results to my race IAT was that I slightly favor European Americans over African Americas. Which means that I have a small hidden bias towards white people. I was completely surprised by these results, although I do not believe I have a hidden bias. One thing that was hard about this test is that it puts you in a distinct rhythm, so without thinking about it you click the letter. When the test changes, its hard to get out of the rhythm right away so the first few words are put into the category that it fit with in the first round. With that said, I don't think this test could really be that accurate. I did read the frequently asked questions, and that question of how accurate the test is because of the rhythm was brought up. They said that it is possible that these are not 100% accurate but for the most part they do show the hidden bias.
I believe that prejudice and stereotypes are around everyone all the time, and those things definitely influence what one believes and feels about a certain subject. Ones environment will influence how the feel about a situation. For example, if someone lives in a predominately white area, like me, they might have a slight or moderate bias towards white people, just because thats what they are around, and accustom to. my environment that I live in my be why my results were the way they were.

I Don't Wish Nobody to Have a Life Like Mine #5

Finishing the book, I realized that a lot of these inmates have the capabilities to change. I didn't realize this because they left jail and never came back, some of them did come back, but I realized this from what some of them said. These kids do have things in their life that are more important then breaking the law. Dario who really was a smart kid, found himself in the SHU, which was the "special housing unit, a maximum security isolation block for the worst inmates"(Chura 190). To me this would be the scariest part of the prison. But when David Chura had to go to the SHU to give Dario a english test so he could get his High School diploma if he past, the scariest people there were the workers, not the inmates. These people who were supposed to be the scariest inmates in the jail, were quiet for the hours it took Dario to finish his test. They all wanted him to succeed. One guy named "old Cal" told David Chura, "Smart, too. You tell him I'm gonna keep these guys real quiet for him so he can think"(207). The people in the SHU helped dario pass his test. They worked together like a family. Old Cal saw someone in jail who he didnt believe should be there are he did as much as he can to help get him out and keep him out, because so many of the people in jail could be succesful in the real world. They have the capablities they just need to try their hardest. Some of the inmates are very intellegent and talented that if they used their brains they wouldn't have to be in jail.
I really enjoyed reading this book, because I got the chance to read about real people stories. Real reasons these people are in jail. I learned alot from this book that I would have nevered learned or thought about.

I Don't Wish Nobody to Have a Life Like Mine #4

For the post I want to focus on the idea of loss of innocence because obviously these kids who are in jail loss their innocence in one way or another. Throughout this whole book, I have been meeting different people in jail and reading their story's. The one thing I've been most interested in as how these people made the leap from innocence to committing crimes. For almost all of the people mentioned in the book, they have no had the best childhood. Ranging from their parents being involved in gangs, to their parents dying when they were very young, to being in and out of foster homes. None of that is easy. But their was one kid who everyone went to so he could write their letters to the judge, Eddie. He was not from the ghetto, living pay check to pay check, and involved in a gang, selling drugs. He was from a rich suburb of Scarsdale, and his father was a big lawyer there. One thing from his past that was hard on him was his mother disappearing when he was six. The most interesting thing I read was that he really was not fit for jail, "He had to remember to yank his pants down his butt, not pull them up;to slouch and shuffle when he walked; to curse. And he had to work on not calling out the answers in class or getting interested in a lesson"(Chura 132). He did not lose his innocence because he got caught up with the wrong group of people. Instead he lost his innocence waiting and wishing for his mom to come back, "When he was younger it as as though he was being bad in order to force his mother out of hiding and straighten him out"(Chura 132). Eddie was an intelligent guy who cared about people. He wanted to help the other guys, he listened to them and he cared about their future. He really didn't have much of a place in jail. He knew better, but it almost seemed like he lost himself trying to find his mother. When his mother left and he became old enough to understand, he tried to be someone he was because apart of him was missing. So he sagged his pants and got ready for his future in jail, helping the other inmates out.

I Dont Wish Nobody to Have a Life Like Mine Post #3

The Chapter that im going to write about is titled, "The Things They Carried," which in jail is not much. The things the prisoners were allowed to carry with them inside of jail was nothing they brought with them, they were allowed, "one orange uniform, one pair of slip-on blue canvas sneakers, and an ID"(Chura 105). The prisoners didnt even get their glasses. Besides from the three things they are allowed to have with them in prison, they carry no other tangible objects. It seems that in prison they are not even allowed to carry dignity or a sense of individualism with them. Everyone carried the same three items, in fact everyone looked the same while crrying them. One thing that was impossible to be banned was the idea of carry tattoos. Tattoos could not have been taken away the way peircings were or glasses were. Tattoos were the only difference between the inmates, considering most of the inmates did carry some sort of tattoo with them. Prison is  a place were inmtes do not deserve to carry anything. They lost their chance of this, when they carried to many tangible and intangible objects with them. They carried, drugs, violence, gangs, stolen property, anything illegal a lot of them have once carried. With that, why should they be given freedom to carry anything else when they absued their chance of being their own person. So if the prisons make such a huge statement by letting these inmates have virtually nothing with them, why is it that these inmates will go through so much trouble to get a new tattoo while in prison? The author david chura said, "Whether I agree or not with the DOC, I still flinched whenever a student came into class with his upper arm, the back of his hand shiny with vaseline, a sure sign that a tattoo was freshly done"(108). Yes a tattoo is an expression, and indivdualism, a chance for a person who wishes to express themselvse permenatly on their body to do so, but its also a chance for prisoners to rebel. Yes if they are caught they will most likely just be in jail for a longer period of time, or even go to the state jail, but is that helping the prisoner change? Does David Chura see a change in these kids in jail. To be honest im not sure. He sees troubled kids, still rebelling in prison. After a while maybe they do change just having nothing to carry, nothing to do, nothing to be proud of. But these kids are in prison, just trying to be themselves, and the only way they could do that is rebel, and cause problems. Im not saying that prison isnt the right place for these people, because for a lot of them it is, but are the prisons trying to punish the kids while trying to fix them? Or are they just punishing the kids, not caring if they come back or not?